E159: This Mindset Habit Helped a Busy Mom Run a Marathon & Make an Impact

Jenny was at a very low point in life and searching for something to help her at this troubling time. She didn't think Healthy Habit Mentor, Valerie LaVigne, would be able to help her, but Jenny invested in the 1:1 Mentorship Program anyway.

After five weeks of working on a 3-part journalling exercise to improve mindset and self-appreciation, Jenny discovered a new-found energy and purpose that brought light and love back into her life. This is Jenny’s story…

[1:12] Valerie: How were you feeling before working with me?

Jenny: A couple of things lost, probably and pretty down to be honest, mentally pretty low.

Valerie: Yeah, I remember with our first call one of the things that you said that no one's ever said to me was, I don't think you can help me and I was so taken aback by it because for one I was like, then why did you say right?

I'm not and that's, I think, so important that people there's a quote by Henry Ford, and he says, whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right. And I think that that's one of the biggest hurdles for people starting something or getting into something is that, you know, right away, they say, oh, no, I can't do that. And that's their first, their first walk into failure, so to speak. Right. So, you know, yeah, with that feeling of being lost, I do have to ask, what made you want to work with me, even though that was one of the first things you said?

Jenny: Yeah. So just to talk about that for a second to say, “I don't think you can help me.” Was it really sort of verbalization of you know how low I was? I didn't think that that that you know, I wasn't sure I wasn't convinced I was skeptical how can how can this help because I'm feeling so low and You're right you've totally hit the nail on the head that it's a very it was a very negative mindset But luckily there was something in me that I had hope and that's why reached out I was feeling tired But I always So had something To me that made me feel like Maybe there's help out there maybe Maybe there's a way to Maybe somebody can make me feel better.

Maybe they can And what you are offering brilliant Face me it sounded Dental It sounded doable and I was feeling so tired hurtful but needed to be babysat That's for me and so Think come on must have seen something on your Instagram And it just took feel to me How it seemed like it was doable And so that's why I took this Step to contact you and it absolutely was.

Valerie: I'm so glad that you Did that. I'm so glad that you trusted your instinct to do that.

Jennifer: There was something in me that made me think you know what to give this a go.

Valerie: Yeah.

Jennifer: yeah It was we were going to work together for these Five weeks so it's like I felt like there was time To make a difference.

Valerie: And within that time What habit did we create together?

Jennifer: So It was a few but I think the Just serve wins during the process was that I had everything right in front of me and I didn't know it, but you showed me that I did and those things. We're so simple the gratitude journaling was really important to me and This was a different kind of gratitude that you introduced me to that I've never or heard of before and what was so important to me was that there was three aspects to it you said thank you Anything you're grateful for Think of anything that brings you comfort Think of it thinking that you're proud of

And I think that's just A winning car combination the winner In Formula Three different things It made my main shift in three different directions What am I grateful for For your draft income For and you know what what I like about myself and that Last part really gave me I think a confidence boost that I was really Looking for because every day I had to think of something What am I good at And Yeah It just all three together was was a kind of Three dimensional design.

Surely cliche but three dimensional way To have gratitude not Just like three things what you're grateful for what brings you Comfort Well what are you grateful for and what are you proud of and And I enjoyed it In that everyday exactly Think about three different things between different areas of my life The last one For you prayed off of yourself was probably The hardest one and probably The one that had the most the impact

Valerie: Yeah, thank you for sharing that I remember you coming to me and that first call like it was memorable. And One of the things you shared was that you want to work on A specific habit that has to do with Nutrition. And when I was listening to you and all of the words Like you were saying you know I knew is that it wasn't the nutrition that we were lenient to work on it There's a deeper level level and layer than Not and you No being able to have that common Session just the two of us one on one I mean that was it was almost Like this container for you to share no going up and as skeptical as you They have been you are incredible Billy Welling and incredibly open and I really want to applaud you for that because a lot of people For especially when you're working Was someone new I mean we didn't really know what other very well before working together so For you to trust me you that much I I mean, that's where I think the most transformation comes from is because you are open to the suggestions. And I know you're thinking, you know, Val, I'm coming to you with this nutrition habit. And I was saying, well, Jenny, actually, there's something else we need to do first.

[7:36] Jenny: Absolutely, but you, you think you don't realize that there's something deeper sometimes I think.

Valerie: And that's why, you know, the one on one can be so impactful, is because we're really customizing it to you like that gratitude journal, that for that gratitude journal, practice with the three questions. Those were completely curated for you. Like that's not like a system that I sell. It says, This is what we need to work on together. That's going to help you so I'm so glad that you enjoyed the process and the practice. And is there anything else that you want to add into how you make it work for you because you're a mom, you have a busy schedule? You are you know, managing your household. Tell me, how did you make it work?

Jenny: First thing I did was to a actually get a new journal so that had something fun I wanted to open every day So I ordered myself Have a new journal which was all So a calendar so that actually I'm not really helpful because I know have specific days to write in there I have a lot of space in it so I could Get those three levels of gratitude written down and then I had heard something and I totally believe it's true Save and filter today That If you can try Start your very first like five minutes From when you you know just woken up Think positively that can really help you with the rest of your Day so I think it really works so I start to journal as an So I woke up and just helped With the rest with the rest The day in terms of how I was feeling so That's So I started with a new journal and And doing this practice every morning.

Valerie: That's excellent that you found the right tools and the right time to do the work, and I I totally agree I like to set an intention every morning. And if that intention has I'd better amplify or the elevation of gratitude to two that's an even more amazing win, so very good! The last question that I have I want to ask you today is all What results did you gain from staying consistent with this habit?

[10:04] Jenny: Quite a few actually, the most important thing to me was a positive state of mind. It’s the reason it gets to be on how to perform better in other areas Of My Life So my Running got better My Parenting I think got better because I was Just generally happier And it sounds And Papa I think I had just put myself To the bottom of the bill I probably wasn't even On the list and Working with To me We realized that I had to be on the list and I I had to be the first thing on the list. That's why the worked well with the you know the product to surface the news I woke up You've heard this cliche before But you know ‘put your own out oxygen mask or first’ it's so true bye during this practice for myself First thing in the morning I was then able to go through the rest of the day or The tasks involved with just Have more positive mindset and also to at least say that then built momentum so that you The next day wasn't so difficult followed by the The following day and the next day. and I gained so much momentum with it that as I went to New York to complete marathon I was in probably the best mental shape that I could be in and thank goodness I took those steps because I think obviously 26.2 miles is really difficult and arduous, but it would have been doubly difficult with a negative state of mind.

Valerie: WOW

Jenny:And now it's just about keeping that going. But I know what to do and It's not expensive. It's not difficult, it's just doing it and I think so many of us are just so busy, and we have forgotten, or haven't even tried. And to try that's the first thing and once you've tried You don't want to give it up I think called it my golden hour I think I talked to you about this, even getting earlier to do it was helpful because everyone's still sleeping could have some time for me so I don't grudge helping everybody. Am I happy to, but In a happier state of mind because if you're not and a half years state of mind that's when the resentment starts to To kick in and it's like truly no one else's fault It's very hard to Move from feeling like it is everyone else's fault and once I made that shift It got better.

Valerie: Wow Thank you so much for sharing that . It's so true, I mean so many things you said so many golden nuggets in there. I'm about How your mindset, especially in the beginning of the day, trickles into all the other areas of your life. It’s power fool and Just yeah whether it's a naked mindset or a positive mindset can really they change things and I I think a lot of people can relate to a lot of people listening can relate to, the fact that you know They're not at the top The list they might not be on the list Well have their priorities and them People that they're going to take care of because you know we've all have busy lives And we all have a lot of priorities, and we all have a lot of have different people that depend on on us but we can be better parents and friends partners when we actually put put ourselves on the list.

So huge! I just… I was getting teary hearing the impact that it made on you And I just like I'm holding my heart So tight right now because I feel everything that you're saying And And like I'm getting goosey and you've done So much work you've come so far.

[14:23] Jenny: And another thing they see that I have friends they do put themselves on the on their list And I had maybe previously thought that oh Wow I like You know I can't be like them or I'm not like them or Those are interesting priorities don't fit case share those And then I realized Hold on a minute They've figured So they've already done this Work it When in their lives But they realized wait a second If I do this then I couldn't be better X Y & Z and live my best life is cliche as it sounds.

But before I did this kind of work, I didn't recognize that they had put themselves on their lists. So now I feel like my eyes are opened to habits that my Friends have that Respect admire and realize oh hey I'm thinking things to know and before thought it was good The snow Not me I'm not person who does block a block but not actually being a person He does do those things Is So good for you and so I think that's that's been really First thing is To sort of you It really opened my eyes to habits of rents in the past sort of think well That's you know you do you and that's what you do this now that's not for me Well now I realize actually Like I've been missing out So thank you for interest You see me too and you You I guess a new way to live.

Valerie: You are most welcome and honestly I feel like I was just holding this space for you to make those observations, and for you to you know do the work and that permission to put Your cell phone first. The permission to make mistakes and miss a day and come back to it so I mean you were really the one Who who made the change and I'm so happy that I could have been there to see this process and to to help You with it because, honestly like i said i I'm just like vibrating right now with that goosebumps and my heart is so full and I'm just so I'm so proud of you I'm so happy for you so well done you did Amazing.

Jennifer: Thank you, it doesn't stop, you’ve got to keep doing the work!

Valerie: I know! And you're doing it, you're doing it. It's so incredible to be part of your journey To watch you through this journey so I can't wait to see what you do next, what marathon you run or what else you accomplish! Because It's inspiring it's outstanding and just Just know that the friends who Have those healthy habits yeah You are now person to somebody yes you are now that inspiration to another person you are now giving permission To another mom another round or another woman Who wants to be impactful in this world and put themselves first so that's That's huge And I think these are the things that we didn't think We were going to get out of have something like this but we do alright we get so much more than we expect.

[17:39] Jennifer: Thank you for saying that because I'm actually seeing that happen already I've had people Message me to tell me that I am inspired to them and can we meet for a call or how Did you do or I want to hear about your journey ever thought I would be one of those people.

And people would actually want to know how you do it? or you know how it's going? or I want to hear and it just shows you that... I am is going to talk about women because that's my experience but so many women are looking for Ways to help themselves and if I can and help them just by being like guinea pig an example of just trying some thing and showing how it worked for me then That helps me to keep going I don't Feel like I'm there yet I feel like every day is a learning day but to know that that could help versus his power because I helps you to keep going too.

Valerie: 100% You're impacting other women now, like, this is exactly why I want to do what I'm doing or why I do what I'm doing. Because I know that if I can help one person, that one person is going to help another person and that person that you're helping is going to help another person and honestly, that is the goal is to have this world be a brighter, better place and as corny as that sounds and trust me like I'm not about cheesy things, but that's so it's so true. and the way that I've been able to do that is through healthy habits and like through helping people with habits that they didn't even know could help them. and it is so freakin simple. So yeah, honestly like again blown away by this conversation.

Jenny: It's a fact that when women have babies, they lose confidence, which is just a sad fact. But it happens. So if that's a fact, then everyone who's got kids has gone through so much, not just, you know, pregnancy and childbirth, but postpartum, Even if you're not, you know, diagnosed with postpartum depression, there are other things that happens and I'm happy to talk openly about that too. But how you do it gives you confidence you may have left your job or done many things like that. And so there's things that can keep you positive in your life. And then once a lot was gone, It's hard to do it yourself. But, you know, you've helped me realize that you can do it yourself.

Yeah, to rely on you know, being praised for your, your work or for anything you can do from within. Then you’re all set.

Valerie: And it's cool to to see like how in the beginning, you're like, something I'm proud of like, you're like, Oh, I ran a marathon. I help other people like I changed my life. I'm a better mom and like so many things, so many things you're proud of and you didn't even have to like put more thought into it. You didn't even have to like, sit there and take a moment you know, and I mean you can just say it, and that's like, that's the transformation and people think like, oh, I need my life to change overnight with like winning the lottery or whatever. But that's not like that's just not it all the time. You know, it's like, the simplest thing you can do and yeah, okay, it takes a little bit of time. But think about like, How long were you upset? How long were you thinking of that negative mindset? How long were you feeling low?

Jenny: Umm probably years to be honest.

Valerie: Now that’s it. And I mean, to say that the work isn't done, you're completely right. It's never gonna really be done. But it's a lot easier to do now. And the fact that you're like shining light for other people and giving permission to other people to do the work. I mean, that's huge. But in such a short amount of time, like we work together for five weeks, that was about three or four months ago.

Let's say like three months since we finished. So in less than six months, you have shifted years of pain and heaviness into something so powerful. I mean, you ran a frickin marathon!

Jenny: I definitely got tools to Yeah, to Yeah, like, more positive and like you said, you know, it just gains in momentum. and now there's a piece of you suggesting that you know, I might help other people. I mean, I didn't even think that was on the cards but I actually now have evidence of that because people are asking me, we meet for coffee, I'd love to hear about your journey and I'm like, okay.

Valerie: Yeah, I love that so much and I appreciate you sharing your journey with me and with the Women's Empowerment Podcast. I'm so excited. I it's interesting because I know the there's quite a commitment for like the one on one mentorship experience with me and I try to explain to people how powerful it is and like it's so much more impactful because it's customized like I could talk about a gratitude journal all day every day. but what we created for you is so different from what I have done with anybody else, but it works for you and that's why we made it for you.

Someone else I talked to they started a gratitude journal too, but they just have to write one thing down they're grateful for which probably wouldn't have worked for you, as much as this other three part one day.

Jenny: I agree, agree.

Valerie: Yeah so it's different for everybody.

Podcast Host

Valerie LaVigne

Valerie is the creator and founder of Valerie LaVigne Life and the Women's Empowerment Show. She helps busy and empowered women create healthy habits so that they can become the best version of themselves and transform their lives. Learn more about Valerie here!