E169: Are Your Intentions Helping You or Hurting You?

In this week’s episode we’ll find out if our goals are helping us or are they hurting us? Plus, we’ll learn how to evaluate our current goals, and how to set more meaningful goals for the future!

For those of you who don’t already know, I’ve been teaching pilates for almost 10 years which is wild and amazing! And I own a reformer pilates studio in downtown Burlington, Ontario called EXHALE PILATES. Reformer pilates is a type of pilates that uses the reformer machine, which is this super incredible piece of equipment that has pulleys and spring tensions that make for a killer full-body workout. Plus it’s super fun and every class is unique and challenging in it’s own way.

Over the decade I’ve taught all kinds of clients: people who are brand new to the machine, pilates enthusiasts, olympic athletes, clients who need support with physiotherapy, new and expecting moms - you name it!

And whenever I first meet someone in a session, I always ask them the same few questions and the answer to one of the questions I have will tell me whether or not this person will be successful with their goals.

The question is: What are your goals or intentions for pilates?

Now the answer is different with each person who comes into the studio, however their answer typically falls under two general categories. And this isn’t just for pilates, it’s for all goals.

So let’s adjust the question to better suit you. Ask yourself, “what are my intentions for (fill in the blank for your most recent goals)?

Maybe these are your 2022 goals, or your goals for the quarter/month/week or even goals for the day. What is the intention behind your goal? What is the goal behind your action?

Why are you doing what you’re doing?

Write down, or make a note of your answer.

The answer will likely fall under either of these two categories: external or internal goals/intentions.

External goals are very common. These will be things outside of ourselves, such as a goal to get a beach body for summer, to make 10k this month or to increase a client list.

The problem with external goals is that they are things we cannot control, at least not directly. There will be many factors affecting these external intentions but they will always be outside of us. The amount of money we make will change every month, our bodies and the way we see ourselves physically will change as well; these are variables.

A great example I heard was if you were to enter a dance competition and your goal was to win the competition. This is an external goal because the three judges adjudicating you are completely out of your control; the results will be different. The judges will change, the other competitors will change, this is out of your control.

Internal goals are intentions that are within our control. They are more internal. They are the types of goals we want to focus on.

Goals like feeling better in our bodies, being consistent with our healthy habits, showing up as the expert in our business networks, reading 10 pages of a book every day, etc.

With our dance competition example, the internal goal would be to increase or correct footwork, hit the right timing, stretch daily, etc.

If your external goal is to attract more clients, consider implementing internal goals like creating consistent, valuable content. It may not have a direct correlation with your sales, but it is in your control. And depending on where you’re sharing the content, there are a lot of insights you can receive from this that can help you improve your following, email list, reach, and with time and consistency can convert a viewer/follower/subscriber into a paying customer.

Let’s take a look at a few more examples:

Someone coming to pilates with an external goal to get a “beach body for summer.” Our physical health has many limbs I’ll call them. Yes physical fitness and exercise will definitely help to improve physical health, but sleep, hydration, nutrition, self talk are also really impactful limbs of how we look and feel physically.

The other concern I have for this type of goal is that it isn’t lasting. At the time of this recording, summer is about 4 months away. This means that someone with this goal could be overworking their body to reach a goal for the summer, and then after summer just completely stop their healthy habits. Then after fall and winter, they will cycle back into this external goal and we’ve now created a vicious and unhelpful/unhealthy cycle.

So what can we do? Well, we can create smaller habits that support our physical health such as regular fitness, prioritizing hydration, meditation, going to bed within the same hour every night, cooking the majority of our meals at home, etc.

For business goals that are internal and controllable, focus on creating valuable content - consistently. Perhaps that is a weekly podcast episode, video, or email.

Consistency with your internal goals is the KEY! This isn’t a once a month or once a quarter commitment. The more consistent you can be, the more successful your goals will be. You can’t be hydrated 2 out of 7 days a week. Your body will be constantly catching up with the hydration.

Recently I listened to tens of episodes of a business podcast I really enjoyed and then randomly they stopped making episodes. No explanation, just no more episodes. I’m not sure where to connect with them, or where to consume more of their valuable content. They haven’t published in over a year!? I was honestly really excited to learn more from them and I would honestly love to buy what they’re selling but I don’t even know if they’re selling anything anymore!?

As a consumer of this valuable content I truthfully feel a bit betrayed by this and am now unsure if I want to buy what they’re selling because what if they just stop producing or go MIA in their paid courses.

Okay, let’s look back at the list of goals we wrote down/made a note of earlier in this episode. Which of the two categories did they fall under? External or internal?

Don’t panic or judge yourself for any external goals on your list. Remember, these are very common. Instead of taking them off your list completely, brainstorm a few internal goals that could support your external goals. Feel free to tap back to rewind this episode for a few of the examples.

When creating internal goals, here are a few questions to ask to keep you on the right track:

Is this goal/intention within my control?
How can I break this goal/intention down into a smaller/bite-sized habit I can do more frequently (daily/weekly)?
How will I track/measure this goal?
What will help me be more consistent with this intention?
What “big picture” or larger goal does this smaller internal goal support?

I am feeling fired up about these new internal goals and intentions we are creating! Now is the time to TAKE ACTION! Screenshot this episode and tag me on instagram @vallavignelife and share your internal goals with me there! I love meeting the listeners of the show and connecting with you more!

Happy intention and goal setting!

Podcast Host

Valerie LaVigne

Valerie is the creator and founder of Valerie LaVigne Life and the Women's Empowerment Show. She helps busy and empowered women create healthy habits so that they can become the best version of themselves and transform their lives. Learn more about Valerie here!