E87: This ONE Practice Could Change Your Relationship with Food

Welcome back to the Women’s Empowerment Show, thank you for joining me for an episode that was inspired by one of our listeners, Leah...

[00:33] Leah emailed me one day and we got to chatting about intermittent fasting, among a couple other things, and while we were emailing back and forth Leah said, “this could be a great future episode.” I loved the suggestion and I had kept a note of the topic with some of our conversation, but it sat in my google docs for a little over a month before I actually figured out what this podcast was going to be, and how I would make it purposeful for the audience.

The reason I didn’t jump on the idea right away is because I don’t practice intermittent fasting anymore. And I don’t like to teach or talk about anything that I don’t do myself. However, intermittent fasting has been a really big piece to getting to where I am today when it comes to my relationship with food, and how I eat.

So before we get into where I am now, let’s jump back to about three years ago when I first committed to intermittent fasting. I say “committed” because I had heard of it before and I had thought about trying it, but I never actually stuck to it.

[1:40] Intermittent fasting has become a very popular trend in the health and fitness world. If you haven’t already heard of it, healthline has a really simple definition which is: “it’s an eating pattern that cycles between periods of fasting and eating.” It’s not about what you’re eating, but actually when you’re eating. Therefore it isn’t a diet, but an eating pattern.

[2:04] There are so many different ways of fasting, and fasting isn’t new by any means.It’s been done for centuries by religious groups, and for spiritual reasons. I’ve fasted for a week at a mediation centre before – I’ll save that for a different episode…

The intermittent fasting pattern is one of two methods: The first is a daily 16-hour fast. And the second is fasting for 24 hours, twice per week.

When I tried this pattern I did the first method, fasing daily for 16-hours.

Most people would agree that the first method is the simplest and the easiest to stick to. Here’s how it works:

You’re allowed to eat in an 8 hour window of the day, and you can choose when the 8 consecutive hours are. I was waking up around 5:30 or 6am so I chose 11am – 7pm
During that 8 hours you’re eating whatever you want
But for the other 16 hours of the day, you’re fasting. No “breakfast” and no “evening snacks”

When people ask me how to choose a window for themselves, I recommend starting with an hour after you wake up, especially if you’ve never fasted before. Then, after a couple days stretch it to two hours after you wake up.

The other tip that helped me start intermittent fasting was if I felt a bit hungry in the morning before 11am, I would wait 30 minutes and if I was still hungry I would eat 30 minutes later. This was in the beginning when I was getting into the habit of the new eating pattern.

[3:48] However, here’s where things changed for ME. I wasn’t hungry in the morning. Like right in the beginning, I wasn’t hungry.

When people learned that I didn’t eat breakfast anymore, most of them were appalled and used to tell me, “But breakfast is the most important meal of the day.” and let me tell you, I used to be one of those people. I used to believe this and think people were crazy for not eating first thing in the morning.

But when I actually checked into my body, I wasn’t hungry. You’re also not supposed to eat when you aren’t hungry. So why should I eat?

[4:30] I grew more curious about the line “breakfast is the most important meal of the day” and learned that it was invented by KELLOGS to sell their new breakfast cereal! Corn flakes are garbage and I don’t care what time of day it is, cereal isn’t good for your body. This is a marketing strategy and it has millions of people believing that they need to eat first thing in the morning. My mind was B L O W N.

Don’t get me wrong, I love breakfast food! And I still enjoy brunch. Just because you don’t eat before 11 am doesn’t mean you don’t eat bacon and eggs!

Anyway. While I started getting into the habit of intermittent fasting, I was also learning a lot about my relationship with food, and also developing a stronger relationship with my body. I was learning about what my body wanted, what it didn’t want, what it craved, when I would crave certain foods. It was like I was finally speaking the same language of my body and I wasn’t just putting food into my mouth because it was “breakfast time” or “lunchtime” or “dinner time” and that’s what everyone else did.

I was also noticeably more alert during the day, I was sleeping better, and I was losing weight. I had gained weight the year before and it took me about a month of intermittent fasting and 5 days/week of weight training to lose the majority of it.

[6:04] Fasting can be very beneficial to the body and affects your cells and hormones. Here are some of the changes that occur in your body when you fast according to an article on healthline:

Human Growth Hormone (HGH): The levels of growth hormone skyrocket, increasing as much as 5-fold. This has benefits for fat loss and muscle gain, to name a few
Insulin: Insulin sensitivity improves and levels of insulin drop dramatically. Lower insulin levels make stored body fat more accessible
Cellular repair: When fasted, your cells initiate cellular repair processes. This includes autophagy, where cells digest and remove old and dysfunctional proteins that build up inside cells
Gene expression: There are changes in the function of genes related to longevity and protection against disease

There are other health benefits of intermittent fasting including:

Reducing insulin resistance and inflammation
Possible reduction of “bad” cholesterol and
Increases the brain hormone that helps the growth of new nerve cells

[7:14] At the end of the day, it’s a very simple practice, and one of the things I teach my health coaching clients is that “Healthy Can Be Simple” it really can.

I can’t remember how long I kept up with the intermittent fasting. I wish I could remember. I think maybe… a year? Two years? It was a while. What I can tell you is that during that time I was also doing A LOT of other things.

I had completely renovated my morning routine. I was waking up earlier and working out first thing in the morning for 4-5 days every week. I was meditating and deepening my spiritual practice, and I was journaling and really diving into personal development.

I can tell you right now that these other lifestyle changes DEFINITELY affected my health and wellness. But the intermittent fasting gave me a structure.It also helped me see that I was a late-night snacker and it got me out of this munchie habit before bed or post-dinner. Full disclosure, I am totally snacking late again – but this is again, maybe for another podcast episode LOL.

It also helped me create a deeper connection with myself and truly discover what it is that my body wanted, not what I thought it was supposed to want or have.

[9:15] Which brings me to the ONE practice that changed my relationship with food: Intuitive Eating.

This means, making food choices without guilt, shame, or judgement, and respecting when our bodies are fed and full. It’s about enjoying food, being present with food, and having a healthy relationship with food and with ourselves.

As a wellness leader I have felt, and still occasionally feel, pressures to eat a certain way and for my body to look a certain way. I have been a victim of external influence and self-judgement and shame. And although I have never had an eating disorder, I have most definitely experienced dis-ordered eating.

Now I sometimes eat breakfast in the morning, usually not but I won’t say no because it doesn’t stick to my eating plan. If I’m hungry, I will eat. To be honest, most days I’m not hungry until 10:30 or 11am.

I love cooking, experimenting with food, and eating and enjoying food. I take pleasure in making meals and trying new things. I’m not paleo, or vegan, or trying the keto diet. I eat foods that make me feel good and happy and nourished. Yes sometimes donuts make me feel happy. Not when I eat too many of them, but you best believe there is an amazing donut shop in town and I am about it!

[10:42] Another really important lesson I learned was that I am what some would call an “emotional eater.” This was a blatant realization about a few months into my time with intermittent fasting. I was really consistent with not eating in the morning and I was feeling really great about it. One morning around 9:30am I had an update for my website and it changed everything! I had to learn, re-learn, and un-learn some of the backend pieces to my website and I do not speak html. It was a nightmare. The more stressed and anxious I became, the hungry I got. But I wasn’t just hungry, I was ravenous for sugar. For anything sweet I could eat at that moment and I was enraged. It was so intense that I actually stopped myself and thought, “Whoa. What the fork is going on with me? I wasn’t hungry one minute ago.”

Now remember, I was really into my spiritual practice as well so my self-awareness was improving and quite strong. I think that if I didn’t have all these habits in place, I might not have even noticed my body change or start craving sugar and might have mindlessly started eating something sweet without even realizing!

It’s all information, but we have to stay in a mindful state for us to really come to the realizations, and if we want to make any impact or positive changes, we’ve got to be self-aware.

[12:30] During my research of intuitive eating I found a website which shares 10 Principles of Intuitive Eating that I wanted to share with you today.

As I go through these 10 principles, I ask that you consider how you could start incorporating them or using them in your own life and in your own eating practices.

[12:58] #1 Reject the Diet Mentality

Stop reading the books and the articles about quick solutions for weight loss. It’s soul damaging and the intention behind diets isn’t safe, long lasting or heart-centred. I’ve said this before on the show, and I’ll say it again: there is a POWER OF INTENTION. What is your intention for losing weight?

If your answer is you want to look good in an outfit, or that you want other people to like you, or some other superficial answer, I will tell you right now, your “diet” isn’t going to be successful.

However, if you want to live a healthier lifestyle so that you can keep up with your kids and be around for your grandchildren, and have a better relationship with yourself, then you’re on the right track. It’s not about a diet, it’s about a lifestyle change.

If you want to practice intuitive eating, you have to give up the diet mentality, it’s not helping you, it’s only hurting you.

[14:22] #2 Honour Your Hunger

Eat when you’re hungry, and don’t overstuff yourself with food. There’s a difference between being hungry and being excessively hungry and gorging on the easiest or quickest “food” you can get your hands on. Notice how your body tells you it’s hungry, and how it tells you it’s full. Honour those signs.

[14:42] #3 Make Peace with Food

“Give yourself unconditional permission to eat.” Telling ourselves that we can’t or we shouldn’t leads us to feeling deprivation, which eventually leads to giving in. This usually ends up with us feeling guilting for doing something that we’re not supposed to do.

We need to start forgiving ourselves for the ways we’ve treated ourselves about food and eating. It’s okay to want certain foods or to eat in general, it’s not okay to punish ourselves or our bodies.

[15:13] #4 Challenge the Food Police

This is referring to the thoughts in our head that tell us we’re “good” for eating healthy or “bad” for eating a donut today. The “food police” are the internal dialogue and the media that has created unreasonable rules following diet culture. Yell a big fat NO! When you hear or see the food police in your life.

[15:40] #5 Discover the Satisfaction Factor

Last night my partner and I prepped a delicious meal. I had to teach yoga in the evening so we decided to eat later so that we could eat together. When I came into the kitchen the food smelled amazing. I was hungry and now that I was smelling all the species I entered this state of excitement and bliss.

There is a door from the kitchen that goes out onto the patio. I went out to find a beautiful place setting for two with candles, and the summer sky. It was so perfect and wonderful and I swear the food tasted better because we prepared it, and celebrated it, and enjoyed it together.

[16:33] #6 Feel Your Fullness

To do this, we need to trust that we’re giving ourselves foods we desire. This is where the listening comes in. Listening to the signals that we aren’t hungry anymore. We are COMFORTABLY full. We can do this by pausing in the middle of our meal and checking in with ourselves. For myself, and a lot of other people, one of the signs that we are full and done eating is when we let out a big sigh. This is my body’s way of saying, “That was delicious. We are done for now.”

[17:11] #7 Cope with Your Emotions with Kindness

Depending on where you’re at and what your relationship with food is like, there can be many different emotions that come up for you. In the example I shared earlier, I felt overwhelmingly stressed and I became ravenous for something sweet. I knew that my body was trying to tell me something, and it wasn’t “feed me the donut” it was scared and needed a hit of dopamine, like it’s gotten before from sugar. But you can also get it from other things, including foods that are high in protein.

Regardless of what emotions come up for you, be kind to yourself. You are learning, growing, and you’re only human. Begin by recognizing the signs of your body and mind and develop that connection and conversation with yourself to better understand what your body needs. Self-compassion is the key.

[18:11] #8 Respect Your Body

Each and every one of us is unique, and magical in our own way. Love yourself the way you are. It’s so unrealistic to believe that everyone has to look or act or be a certain way. All bodies are beautiful.

[18:31] #9 Movement – Feel the Difference

I definitely notice a difference between how my body feels when I was waking up early and lifting weights, than it does now, with a weekly routine of yoga, pilates, walking and some weights. One is not better or worse, it’s just different.

Daily movement is fundamental for our health, like I always say: a body in motion stays in motion. You don’t need a militant exercise routine, you just need exercise!

Find an exercise or a type of physical activity that YOU enjoy! This will keep you active, happy, and consistent.

[19:14] #10 Honour Your Health – Gentle Nutrition

For this last one I’m going to read directly off what the site says because I really like it:

“Make food choices that honour your health and taste buds while making you feel good. Remember that you don’t have to eat perfectly to be healthy. You will not suddenly get a nutrient deficiency or become unhealthy, form one snack, one meal, or one day of eating. It’s what you eat consistently over time that matters. Progress, not perfection, is what counts.”

*slow clap*

[20:09] Listen, if you’re just learning about intuitive eating, or if you’re interested in making it a part of your life, start with checking in with yourself and asking yourself what it is that you want? Not what the voice of the food police in your head wants. You can also connect with me on instagram if you ever want to chat. You can find me @vallavignelife.

Val Lavigne Life Women's Empowerment Podcast

Podcast Host

Valerie LaVigne

Valerie is the creator and founder of Valerie LaVigne Life and the Women's Empowerment Show. She helps busy and empowered women create healthy habits so that they can become the best version of themselves and transform their lives. Learn more about Valerie here!